Thursday, January 3, 2013

Whose Mistake?

Today its almost 20years Rohit use to call every next monday. And today its a again a monday. From the last 20 years I am somehow trying to avoid his call. I use to leave my home at this time by giving an excuse of going temple. Ragini wasn't at home this time she's at at the college from morning. Karan has gone to office to complete some stuff. And He specially told me to be at home as Rohit is going to call and confirm the day of his coming back from Austria.
Suddenly a Phone rang. I was scared but still i move slowly and picked up the receiver..'Hey Dad! Rohit here..'Voice came up. Suddenly a receiver falls from my hand. Suddenly a voice came from my Head 'Open the door! Just bloody open the door' Karan come and pick up the receiver 'Hi Rohit! Dad here' Rohit said..'Mom..?' Karan replied 'No Rohit mom is busy in Kitchen. So tell me when are you coming' Rohit replied 'Dad! Sunday at night 2AM'. Karan said..'I will personally come to pick you up'
Rohit asked..'And Mom?' Karan maintained a silent for 2 mins and then replied.. 'Why not! Mom, Ragini di we all will come to pick you up' Karan put the call.. and looked at to me with anger and said 'Anisha! Whats go wrong with you? Its almost been 25 years. Just Forget it' And gone back to his Rolling chair. I was still standing there stunned. Looking down. I walked slowly towards my room and locked it from inside. Room has the dull light. I sit at the corner of my room.. And started crying out loud.. Why can't I accept Rohit? Just because Karan is not Rohit's father. Just because I never dream of him he was result of tragedy! But when Karan doesn't have a problem. Ragini like him as brother. Then why can't I? And all this Question drag me in flash back.
Karan was at the beginning of his Carrier He was transferred to Junagarh. Ragini was 3 year old. We had a Tejbahadur as a servant. I never liked him. He has very inadequate manner. I always complaint Karan about his behavior. But Karan always scold me saying ' You always see bad side of servants. He is very smart. I specially asked for him'.
One day! Karan went to office early. And I send Tejbahadur at market. And bath Ragini and make her slept. And then went to a Bathroom for bathing Suddenly I saw an eye peeking from a Hole. I was scared. I kept my hand on the hole and shouted 'Whose there?' And a reply came 'Open the door'. It didn't took me a second to recognize the voice. Its of Tejbhadur. He shouted more loudly 'Open the door' Also added 'Else i would do it with your daughter' I wrapped up my self in towel and open the door and rush toward my daughter. Suddenly 2 hands locked me from behind.
When I open my eyes everything was changed. Karan took transfer to Delhi. And with time I got a news of being pregnant. Doctor avoided the abortion as i was in depression. He doesn't have a shadow of Tejbhadur in his face. But still i never able to accept him. After 4years Karan send him to Austria to his sister. And now after 20 year He's coming back.
His eyes will ask me so many question. What was my mistake mom? I didn't chose be that. Why you never hugged me? Why you never give me that Motherly feeling. It wasn't his mistake.
I ran towards Karan wardrobe took his Photo and hugged it tightly. Now I cant wait to see him.

1 comment:

  1. ...
    words will spoil everything...
    :) You are just awesome Lizzy :)

    ReplyDelete